Site Arrival...

After all the craziness of Swearing-In and my site swap, we flew to Ha’apai Friday morning and immediately had a PC run “partners workshop” which was supposed to be with our counterparts from our job sites. There was a woman from the Wesleyan school system there, who was very nice, but she doesn't actually work in the school I'm working in (they have a primary and high school, and I'm supposed to teach in the primary)- she is the principle of the collage (aka high school to us) but she is leaving in a few weeks because she got transferred to Tongatapu. Regardless, after the meeting she took me to a house, supposedly my house, dropped me off, and after a few minutes left. The house was just horrible- first, it didn't meet any of the PC safety requirements, it hadn't been lived in or cleaned in years, and it was in the driveway of a minister's house- he's dead but his wife still lives there. I was a bit confused because when they confirmed the site the other day they told PC about a house that Viliami said he knew, and it was a totally different house. And, when I asked the minister's wife she made me feel like shit and basically said that I was being a spoiled American, although not in so many words. She phrased it as, “I thought you wanted to live like a Ha’apai girl.” I didn’t know what to do, so I borrowed a broom from her and started to sweep. I swept up huge piles of dirt and ants, animal poop, and dead animals- mostly lizards and mice. After the third dead mouse I kind of lost it and had my first real breakdown in Tonga. Not knowing what else to do, I called the education program manager and he came right over, took one look at the house, and told me he was taking me away. We sat outside in the driveway for a while just thinking and me, doing my best not to cry. I just felt terrible- I realized no one knew I was coming or they just didn’t care. Either way, I felt like they didn’t even want me to be there, and it made me so sad. Viliami took me to the guest house where he was staying with the outer island Ha’apai volunteers, and I ended up staying there for a bit more than a week. I had no house, and even though Poli, one of the language teachers, came to stay with me, there was a lot of confusion about the housing situation.

Finally, all of our stuff that we bought in Nuku’alofa came on the boat (we could only bring carry-on luggage with us for the first week and a half) and Poli insisted that I be moved into a house before she went back to Tongatapu for Christmas, and I was taken to a different house, which was quite dirty, as it hadn’t been lived in for 3-4 months, but wonderful and right near the school and other teachers. We broke the lock since no one had a key, and left my stuff inside although I still stayed in the guest house. The house had belonged to an Australian volunteer who had married a Tongan and was now pregnant and living in Pangai with him and his family, and she left maybe a hundred creepy and moldy little kangaroos and koala bears, complete with ‘I <3 Australia’ t-shirts and flags hanging from strings on the ceiling and curtains…it was just weird. I came back and cleaned like crazy, and was so lucky to have Grant’s help (a PCV who has been here for a year and lives on an island, Ha’ano, close by).

Today, Christmas Eve, the head of the Wesleyan church for all of Ha’apai essentially tracked me down in his SUV and began to yell at me for moving houses. This same man had publicly scolded me after church on Sunday and told me I was a bad Peace Corps because I didn’t like my house and accused me of running away and other fun things. At the time I didn’t know who he was and was shocked that Poli and the only other woman I knew would let someone talk to me like this without any sort of help or defense- thank god Tongans don’t get sarcasm. Once I learned he was a fifekau, it all made sense. Anyways, he decided to voice his opinions again while I was alone, and it was terrible. Every time I tried to tell him I was staying in the second house, he would switch from English to Tonga- my Tongan is by no means fluent, and I was so upset I couldn’t even begin to answer. On the verge of tears I just said “fine” and walked away. Cue Alicia calling Viliami crying part II. It's Christmas Eve, I have no real home, no community, and instead of inviting me to Christmas church or youth group or something the head of the community I was placed in yelled at me- I haven’t felt so badly or so angry in a long time.

I found out the real reason he and others didn’t want me in the second house was because they use it for Australian volunteers, most of whom are retired, who come for 3 months to volunteer and, upon leaving, usually donate money to the school. Since everyone in Tonga is looking for a free handout, whether it’s in the form of grants, aids projects, or actually handing over cash from friends, family, or complete strangers, it’s all beginning to fall into place. Tonga won’t even buy a new boat to replace the Olovaha, the main supply boat that carries goods from Tongatapu to Ha’apai and Vava’u, despite never being intended for use on open water, which is always broken and not running, because the Japanese are going to donate a boat at the end of 2010, and god forbid Tongans buy anything themselves.

Admittedly, that was not the most culturally sensitive rant, but from what I’ve seen so far, it is true. I just feel so poorly, and I know my “community” doesn’t care whether or not I’m there, just that I'm not going to be as profitable. I am upset with PC for putting me in this placement, despite a complete lack of site development or even advanced notice. Viliami is still contemplating moving me to Vava’u, so we’ll see what happens. In the meantime, he is coming back to Ha’apai on Monday and we’re going to have a meeting with the school. I hope things aren’t as bad when I get back from Christmas.